Screw the soft rock and the salad bars!

The show previously known as "Eclectic Relaxation"
(no doubt attracting middle-aged, smooth jazz lovers
and weight-watching moms alike)
has been renamed: Sasquatch and You.

Scientists and academics overwhelmingly "discount the existence of Sasquatch" because the evidence supporting belief in the survival of a prehistoric, bipedal, apelike creature of such dimensions is "scant."

YEAH RIGHT.