Hi, I am a bear at a rave inside a monster’s belly. I’m drinking honey-flavored energy drinks and I’m seriously going off. There’s a crazy game of four square over there in the corner. Suddenly, this album comes on. I’m going off a lot, right now. I take my bear phone out of my fur pocket and I use Shazam – it’s Squarepusher. I do a rudimentary search on Wikipedia. Squarepusher is the pseudonym of Tom Jenkinson, English electronic musician who has made many releases since 1994, and apparently this is his first album that is purely electronic. From his own words, he says that he wanted to go for something “pure, melodic, but very aggressive.” I’m hearing trance synths, cheesy synths, sine waves and robot voices twisting up and down in pitch… spastic, glitched out drum beats, and horrifying string arrangements, much like Aphex Twin or Venetian Snares. I’m left broken, black-eyed and blue. I feel like I’m in an 8-bit haunted house, and then I’m crushed and packed like sardines in a tin can. Gnar. When bears say gnar, it’s usually a combination of them being stoked and chewing on something at the same time. I just knocked over someone’s honey-flavored energy drink. I’m gonna get in a fight tonight.
